Deadpool

Many people hate Valentine's Day weekend. Mostly because they're single. However, this weekend, I'm not part of that crowd. I have a lovely girlfriend and life is just going great. So, why am I reviewing Deadpool, a movie that's so terribly not for Valentine's Day celebration, instead of some lovey-dubby heartfelt movie like most couples go see? Besides the fact that we live 300 miles away, it's because my girl and I are not capitalized idiots, and I wouldn't dare take her to a two-hour fuck fest when we could see something so much better. I mean, hey, she loves Tarantino films. Fuck, I love her. That's enough about that.

Deadpool, oh Deadpool. We've been waiting a long-ass time for this movie to come round. Especially after they literally raped every bit of dignity out of the character in X-Men Origins: Wolverine. But this time around, no one's mouths are sewed shut, and no one's wearing animated green suits. The way that Deadpool should be. Marvel and Fox took a gamble on making this one, and oh my god did it pay off. 

The movie stars Ryan Reynolds as the titular merc with a mouth. It goes over the origin story cliche about how Wade Wilson eventually becomes Deadpool, going through love, cancer, and a cleverly timed reference to the Green Lantern. Meanwhile in the present, the men who subjected him to the pain and loss he gained while becoming Deadpool have kidnapped his girlfriend (well, ex-girlfriend...well...depends), and now guess who has to stop him. What ensues is two hours of ass-kicking, gory goodness.

You know the plot of this movie is a little standard for a superhero film. Guy becomes superhero, important person is kidnapped, yadda yadda yadda...oh, who the hell am I kidding. Deadpool is fucking great. The plot aspect I brought up is not too far from fiction, but it's easily made up for by the beautiful direction mumbo-jumbo, and the humor. Oh. My. God. The humor. Easily the best thing in this movie by far. Deadpool's wise-cracking ass is easily the highlight of the movie...that's nothing surprising, but it's the truth.

Ryan Reynolds does a fantastic job playing this not-Joker joker. It almost feels like they made this role for him, like he was born to play Deadpool, or Deadpool was created for him. They go together so extremely well, and that's what makes the character go so well in this movie. Also fantastic is Morena Baccarin, playing Deadpool's bae, Vanessa. I've seen Baccarin before in Gotham, and she's fantastic there, and she's fantastic here. I'll leave the fanfiction up to you. The backup heros of Colossus and Negasonic Teenage Warhead also provide some good humor. The only real loose end is I can't believe it's not Luke Evans as the villain Ajax. But, I suppose that's why he was credited as, "A British villain."

I could try and give you some bad points about this movie, but I'd be lying to your face. In all honesty, this is the Deadpool movie that everyone had always wanted. It ticks the right boxes, it makes the right jokes, and -insert blowjob joke here-. So, Deadpool gets a bold 5 out of 5 stars, what I think is my first 5 out of 5 for the year. So nice, you gotta see it twice.